Girls 10

I believe that all of us guy will have at least a special girl in throughout our life that we are extremely fond of. At a certain time frame, it will most probably be a single girl that was able to capture all your attention, your mind and even your soul. "The ONE" girl is so special in your life that you are dying to make her your girl.

However, most of the time, she will date with some other guys, whom you think they did not deserve it, they did not treat her as good as you, they did not treat her as special as you do...they did not even go after her, at all... Yet she is willing to date these guys happily rather than going out with you! Am I saying something you have experienced before or you are going through right now? Do you want to know the method on how to get a girl to like you?

If your answer is YES, then pay your 100% attention here: Do not pay so much attention on a particular girl!! Let me rephrase and emphasize again, STOP TREATING ANY GIRL AS THE SPECIAL ONE! You hear me right, there are so many awesome girls out there; Stop thinking of a single girl in every moment of your life. Stop paying attention at her single move. Stop letting any girl to know that you are desperately looking forward to own her!

Girls 05

What is so special of the North East girls? We need to find out the motives of the Delhi people or other Indian's mindset that leads to frequent eve-teasing, molestation and rape of our girls?

"North East girls are very beautiful", said one of the Editors of a premier fashion and modeling magazine based in National Capital Region (NCR). "Their skins are flawless...they are little angels, we need new faces from these regions." I got this remark while working for a Fashion magazine as Executive Editor. Today, I am quoting his words in the backdrop of the recent molestation and harassment of North East girls by their landlord.

The tragic incident in the early hours of December 13, 2008 where the landlord knocked at the door of a rented room at Sikandrapur, DLF Phase-I in Gurgaon is another crime meted out to our girls in Delhi and its adjoining areas. The two girls had come to Gurgaon on December 11 in search of a suitable job. In the very week of the International Human Rights Day, our girls are humiliated and discriminated. And the law of the country is protecting the culprits, as usual.

According to a reliable source from the New Delhi-based North East Support Centre and Helpline (NESCH), the two girls were sleeping when at around 2.30 a.m. on December 13, their landlord knocked the door. The girls had suspected his attention and refused to open their door. The consequences was not good, he repeatedly barged the door, abusing them for the delay in letting him in. Frightened and hapless, the girls had pleaded for mercy. They even requested to meet them in the morning. The landlord was adamant to sneak into their room. The girls tried to call SOS of Police, which did not work out. Later they raised an alarm for a Manipuri friend, who also stays in the same locality. When they came to rescue the girls, the landlord and his gangs had beaten them and chased away. Thereafter, the two girls were tortured, abused, and molested. They were confined to secluded room and even threatened to rape them. All their belongings were looted- money, cloths and camera.

The event should not be taken lightly. We should pledge this one to be the last incidence of crime against our girls. We need to unite and come together to protect ourselves. Integrity and unity is the answer now. The north east states of India are divided into different communities and sub-castes, may be 500 groups (both officially and non officials). These fragmentation and division make us weak and powerless in any issues. Our road to solidarity is often a failure. We are unable to punish culprits in the earlier molestations or rape cases. This encourages the offenders to continue their exploitations and tortures our girls from time to time. They have taken undue advantages of the internal differences and clashes among us. Collectively, we should have a powerful voice soon!

North East girls are the most beautiful female in India. Their looks are so innocent, pure and symbol of truth and sincerity. They always respect the elders, addressing - bhaiya, uncleji, auntyji etc. This makes them extraordinary from other girls. However, they have been harassed, abused and discriminated every day. They are the cynosure of soring eyes. No one spares them - shopkeepers, auto rickshaw drivers and bus conductors. The people from mainland forget to realize these girls have travelled 4000 kilometers from their home to study and work.

There are also girls from other states of India. And not a single report of rape, molestation or eve-teasing against the girls from Madhya Pradesh, Kerala, Tamil Nadu or Bihar. However, we heard of raping and molesting foreign tourists from countries like Germany, France, Japan, China and other South Asian countries in Rajasthan, Goa or Delhi. Can we compare our girls with these foreigners? Is this the reason for sexually abusing NE girls? Are we alien here in India or some refugees from foreign countries? If they regard us as foreigner, then our struggle for a separate country is legitimate and politically acceptable? If it is a fact, then the Central government should proclaimed to the world that North Eastern states were never a part of India. Otherwise, they should protect and take necessary actions to save our integrity and community from further exploitations in Delhi or other Indian cities.

What are those physical structures in our girls that are a subject of sexual abuses and crimes? Do they have more curves than those North Indian girls, fetish or more hot (often a term used by North Indian man to describe a woman). Are our girls used to reveal their assets or body more than Bipasha, Mallika Sherawat or Rakhi Sawant? Does our girls dressed tight tops, jeans, and deep cut blouses? No one would ever find any of our girls in such wardrobe mismanagement. The people of Manipur have already designed 32 different kinds of dresses during 12th century A.D. At that time, Indians were still uncertain of what to wear and how to dress sensibly. Then it is injustice on the part of Delhi authorities to impose a dress code for the NE girls only. Instead they should dictate strict rules on Delhi's landlord, Paying Guest owners and police personals to protect and care our girls. The mainstream media should stop representing stereotype image of our girls as easily available for party, enjoyment and sex.

We also need to know why the Biharis (people from Bihar) owners and managers of small private company always search for NE girls as their Personal Secretaries or Receptionists or sales girls in shopping malls. Why the fashion photographers wants models or new face from our region for bold, inner wears or compromising photo shoots? Why so many beauty parlors recruit our innocent girls? Why we have started a so called live-in culture in rented rooms, misguiding to our landlords as brother-sister relationship. Why so many MMS scandals are uploaded online which depicts immoral acts of our own girls and boys? And why our parents and guardians do not think twice to question what type of jobs their daughters are doing - part time, freelance or full time? We need to critically analyze these unsolved myths, if we want to protect further crimes on our community.

Girls

There can be hope for the girl child in terms of a bright future if we can tackle one of the greatest challenges of human existence i.e. the challenge of gender discrimination and bias. Only gender equality with total women empowerment can ensure a safe and secure future for the girl. When women are healthy, educated and free to take the opportunities of life, they prosper. When women prosper in life the family in turn flourishes and flourishing families with assertive women in charge ensure bright future for the baby girl.

Children who are the future wealth of a nation can flourish and thrive only when women in the family and the society are healthy, educated and independent in terms of making informed choices about their life. But the situation is far from ideal. Women are facing extreme hardships and marginalization because of gender based discrimination and bias. They are subjected to innumerable forms of violence and hardships.

Majority of Women in large parts of the world are weak and are subjected to a life which is totally dependent on others. She faces domestic violence, falls in the trap of commercial sexual exploitation and faces the brunt of harmful traditional practices such as early marriage, premature pregnancy, female genital mutilation etc.

The negative consequences of all this is faced by the baby girl. The practice of girl child feticide, infanticide, low enrollment into education, abuse and a life of misery and deprivation is what that is in offering for the girl child when women are weak and they are not able to take care of their children.

So any optimism for the girl child development and progress depends upon the total empowerment of women. Gender based equality can ensure the resurgence of strong and assertive women and in such circumstances we can see the real flourishing of the baby girl. Totally empowered women will share a relationship of equality with their partner.

This in turn will lead to a positive reinforcement where the girl child will be adequately taken care in a secure and protective home environment. We can see that empowerment of women and the girl child is a mutually inclusive phenomenon where the development of women can lead to the development of the girl child and this in turn leads to further empowerment and development of women. In fact such positive cycles once generated will carry on in a continuous manner.

Child labour is one of the main reasons why children don't go to school and waste their precious childhood. A girl child most often falls prey to child labour in her own home in the sense that she is put into a condition where she has look after all the household chores from a very young age. This curtails any chance of education. In many cases the baby girl is also forced to contribute to the primary means of earning for the family.

Therefore either she ends up working as a child labour outside her home or participates in running the household and becomes a hidden child labour. Elimination of child labour often requires innovative income-generating ideas for parents who rely on their children for income. Economic development, training and loans for parents help give children the freedom to enjoy their childhoods and complete their education without exploitation. Elimination of child labour in either of the above mentioned forms is only possible if we can make the family unit viable economically and educate them further to keep their girl child in school.

Hope for the girl child: The Role of government and other structures of society in elimination of child labour

To make the family unit viable economically and give a future to the baby girl, social organizations, government bodies and other structures of the society should work at the ground level and provide facilities or avenues for gainful employment for the parents.

This can also include credit and micro level finance facilities to start up small scale enterprises at the local level. These types of facilities to the parents can reduce child labour and ensure the completion of primary and secondary education of the girl child. Empowering parents, especially mothers, with income-generating skills and by providing them with loans for small businesses and market access for their products should be taken up in a massive scale so that we can prevent the young women labour.

Education of the parents, the family and the society is also necessary where it has be clearly communicated that the baby girl should go to school and how her education is important for the family and society. Further parental education should also include communication against the repressive customs, traditions and mindset of the society which leads to the discrimination against the baby girl. There should be also some incentives planned to keep the girl child in the school.

A difficult and less supportive home environment is the prime reason why young women don't go to school. High illiteracy rates among women and lower school attendance rates among young girls, especially at the secondary level, constitute discrimination against the girl child. Unreasonable workloads in the home, preferences for sons, a disregard for the rights of girls, early marriage, child labour, poverty, and the threat of violence keep too many young women from completing their education and trap them and their families in cycles of poverty.

The other major hindrance against a good home environment for the girl child is the regressive gender beliefs, customs and traditions. In fact most boys, men and women know that young women are overloaded with work but little is done to help girls in any possible way or take a share in their workload. This is due to beliefs about gender and the role of a girl, and to the economic situation of the family, society and the nation as well. Here the need is to engage men and boys to create gender parity: encourage them to contribute to the work of household chores and to challenge violence and gender roles and traditions that are unjust and harmful.

Young women empowerment and hope for the baby girl in terms of a better future is only possible if we strengthen the family unit and provide a secure, protective and caring home environment for the girl child. The family needs to be made economically viable. Once this happens then we can free the young women from the child labour that she is put into. Further through parental education and training we can eradicate regressive and repressive customs, traditions and mindset which make the society biased against the girl child.

These parental education and training programmers should go into specifics and discus every aspect about the girl child development and empowerment including the nutritional and healthcare requirements, education, recreation and free time for the girl, sexual and reproductive rights and protection against sexual abuse. To keep the girl child in school incentives can be planned and actually the economic support to the family should be tied up with the criteria of girl education.

The positive benefits from all these programmers can be seen as a change in the home environment where parents will provide a loving and secure environment for the girl child to grow and blossom. She would be taken care in terms of her nutritional and health requirements and she will be sent to school with a progressive mindset. Further this will foster a secure environment where the parents and elders will be vigilant against sexual or other kind of abuse against the girl including violence. The girl child will thus grow in a home environment which is supportive to her needs in every possible way.

Concrete steps that is required in providing a congenial home environment for young women includes empowering families economically to prevent worsening poverty and the harmful consequences of child labour and exploitation; providing adequate health services and abuse prevention systems to protect children; educating all girls, boys, men and women on rights of children, rights of women and human rights, as well as their roles and responsibilities in upholding these rights through preventing violence and discrimination and building gender equity in the home, community and nation.